You boot up your word processor, TECHTRIX WRITER, your personal favorite bit of software from the ARBITOR SUITE. It makes writing RUDE LETTERS so very efficient, which in turn makes your position in the culture war against your father's PROUD NOTES oh so much more defensible.
The pen may be mightier than the sword, but the sword is nothing to a Chicago typewriter.
This time though, you're not going to write a rude letter.