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KANAYA: I Dont Know Whats Wrong With Me

KANAYA: Why Couldnt I Light Up For You

KANAYA: I Tried The Hardest I Could

KANAYA: I Exerted Myself The Most And I Struggled

KANAYA: I Could Not Even Provide Lights When Asked

KANAYA: Something Changed And

KANAYA: It Was Here One Day And Was Gone The Next

KANAYA: It Hasnt Been Here For A While

KANAYA: Forgive Me For Assuming Something Of You But I Feel Im Right When I Say You Must Be Asking Yourself When It Would Have Left Me But I Do Not Have An Answer

KANAYA: I Will Take Your Nodding As Affirmation

KANAYA: And That Too

KANAYA: . . .

KANAYA: I Appeared In Our Wedding Photos

KANAYA: And I Was Not Glowing At The Time

KANAYA: The Only Photos I Have Been In Are The Ones In Which I Was Glowing

KANAYA: I Hadnt Learned Not To Yet

KANAYA: Photos Take Light To Produce

KANAYA: It Is What The Word Means If I Understand Correctly

KANAYA: . . .

KANAYA: Perhaps The Silence Is Not Worth It Right Now

KANAYA: Please Speak With Me Love

KANAYA: I Do Not Remember Whether I Did Or Not

KANAYA: Goodness I Do Not Remember That At All

KANAYA: # # #

KANAYA: So

KANAYA: What Changed

KANAYA: Fuck

KANAYA: We Had Done So Much

KANAYA: We Kept Waiting And Waiting And Waiting

KANAYA: Its All We Ever Fucking Do Around Here Is Wait For Things To Happen

KANAYA: Now They Are

KANAYA: And I Hate It

KANAYA: If Now Is Not The Time To Continue My Species

KANAYA: To Bring Them Into A Thriving World That Is Shaped By Trolls Who Care Immensely For Them

KANAYA: When Is The Right Time

KANAYA: Of Course

KANAYA: Your Hair Was Only Slightly Less All Over The Place Than It Is Now

KANAYA: I Do

KANAYA: What I Would Not Give To Pretend Caring About The Right Time Is A Choice And Not A Mandate

KANAYA: . . .

KANAYA: Do You Think My Lusus Would Have Survived The Parasite

KANAYA: Do You Think She Could Have Spoken To Me From There

KANAYA: Offered Wisdom Or

KANAYA: Even Consoling Words That Perhaps Did Not Provide A Meaningful Course Of Action

KANAYA: But Did Acknowledge That It Was Difficult Being A Kid And Growing Up

KANAYA: And That Nobody Understands

KANAYA: Can I Pretend She Would Have At Least

KANAYA: Ha Ha

KANAYA: Yes It Is Very Strange

KANAYA: . . .